Baby Marie-Antoinette is so upset that the St. Louis Cardinals didn’t win against the San Francisco Giants so this is what she’s going to do this Friday night:
The Kanas City Royal are going to the World Series, and Baby Adolf likes that a lot.
Some are saying that the Royals are America’s team, but that is stupid, because the Royals aren’t named the American Royals, they’re named the Kanas City Royals.
Also, America is big, slow, undisciplined, and it loses it a lot, like the war in Iraq.
"When almost everyone wants you to be someone else, it takes guts to be who you want, and I want to be the one who kills every single boy on the San Francisco Giants."
"If Randy Choate didn’t get that boy out then we would’ve gone to San Francisco (which is so gay and stupid) and chopped his head off and then posted video of us chopping his head off on YouTube. But since he did get that boy out, it’s fine."
"Does Mike Matheny have a crush on Randy Choate or something? I mean, he is so stupid. His ERA is so high. And he lost the game yesterday. Michael Wacha should be the pitcher."