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The baby despots are: Baby Adolf * Baby Marie-Antoinette * Baby Jong-il * Baby Uday & Qusay * Baby George III * Baby Idi * Baby Joseph * Baby Mary I * Baby Alexander * Baby Napoleon.

Once upon a time on a frustratingly depressing Monday night a couple of the Bambi Muse baby despots’ mommies read them Twins, a mini choose your own adventure book by Megan Milks.

Elizabeth and Jessica are twins. People think Elizabeth is the “serious one” because she likes having time alone to read, write, and think. Contrariwise, Jessica wants “lots of friends around her all the time.” School isn’t of primary concern to Jessica. She prefers fun, “though her idea of fun sometimes gets her into trouble.”

One day, Elizabeth discovers her English teacher is an alien. Her and her twin hatch a plan to steal his special Alien gizmo in order to save him. But Elizabeth isn’t an advocate of theft, so Jessica suggests that they switch places.

Baby Adolf would never switch places with anybody (except maybe Simba). But even if Baby Adolf wanted to switched places with somebody (like Simba), he couldn’t, since Providence tells him what to do, and Providence told him not to swap identities with Jessica.

So, Baby Adolf’s mommy turns to page 28, and Elizabeth’s BFF agrees to distract the English teacher so that she can steal his Alien gizmo. Baby Adolf opts to fiddle with the gizmo to find out what it’ll do. Baby Adolf is curious boy; he thinks of things that few others do, like gas chambers for humans. Baby Adolf’s choice pulls him to page 31, where Elizabeth becomes ruler of an alien planet, a role that would suit Baby Adolf quite nicely.

As for Baby Joseph, he selects to switch identities with Jessica. Occasionally, Baby Joseph wishes he was someone else, like someone who didn’t have to rule over a bunch of subjects who rather backwards.

Baby Joseph’s adventure leads to him intentionally fail a test, lie to aliens about his identity, and, finally, become besties with the girls of the Baby-sitters Club.

The end elated Baby Joseph. He adores the BSC girls, espescially Claudia and Stacey. Unlike Russians, who don’t even get dolled up for the ballet, C and S “are the most sophisticated dressers in all of Stonybrook.”


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posted on February 5, 2013

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